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[Verse 1:]
Friday fucking night
We bout to do this right
Dicky rollin to the club, he about to find his wife
Cause he fresher than a kid that called his mom a fuckin ho
Bunch a bitches getting low
Pimpin you already know
I'm bout to get up on the flo and then bring chicken to ma crib
Getting drunk up in this muthafucka, fuck you think this is?
Then I see a bad bitch with a booty and a half
I make a move on that cutie, excuse me do you wanna dance
Then she looked at me and laughed
Like I didn't have a chance
Like I shouldn't even asked
So I proceeded to get trashed
And I'm at the bar now, and it's so loud
But I'm takin shots, and I'm throwin down
And I see a pretty lady, so I send her some of that cold brown
And she turned around, and then turned it down
Because in her words, she don't like to flirt with clowns
And I'm alone and pouting, overcrowded, I need to get up out this club
[Chorus:]
I been inside this club for way too long
I wanna leave and eat calzones
None of these females wanna bone
Ma self esteem is all but gone
[Verse 2:]
Bout to quit, but I'm bitter I paid that cover
So I guess I gotta stay in this stupid club a bit longer
And I'm sweating like a jew in a multicultural sauna
They been playing fuckin dubstep for ten consecutive songs
And then I bumped into a guy
He was roughly 6 foot 5
Pretty sure it was his fault, but I apologized
Pretty sure you know the type, probly bankin every night
Vodka sprite, lookin round to find a kike that he can fight
Or suckerpunch, I'm kinda drunk, and I been in the club for way too long
Now I'm up in the corner, all alone, ESPN up on ma phone
Ma self esteem is so depleted, such a mess, I'm overheated
I regretfully just tweeted some depressing shit, I need to leave this club
[Chorus:]
I been inside this club for way too long
I wanna leave and eat calzones
None of these females wanna bone
Ma self esteem is all but gone
[Verse 3:]
Is this really for the bathroom, are you kidding?
This the type of line where people squeeze they dick to prevent pissing
When I get inside the stall it's like a yeti had been shitting
And there's piss all on the ground, so as I'm wizzing I keep slipping
Fuck this hand stamp
Club is really damn cramped
Fuck it, I'm a suck it up and take another damn chance
Ughh, here goes nothing (c'mon D)
Ay girlie, what's the word
At first glance I may look like a nerd
But if you let me, bet D, get thee, all up in the bed so wet like a mafuckan jetski
Real rap if you tryna go, then put your name right here up inside ma phone
She took bait, no way, typing out her home, she pressed save,
Walked away, and her name was no?
[Chorus:]
I been inside this club for way too long
I wanna leave and eat calzones
None of these females wanna bone
Ma self esteem is all but gone