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clock hits AM once again/blood shot eyes/and callused fingers/the purple glass/the fear that lingers/maybe just a brush with suicide/but Im not that desperate and never could be/no matter how bad Im dying inside/at least I can keep one half of me alive/the phone is silent/but my ears are ringing/the call I missed because Im clinging/to yesterday or maybe last week/my calendars just numbers to me/cant I spend one nite in peace/these requests I fear are to much/buried deep below my feet/shake the ground as I try to clutch/the first thing I can get my hands on/you always scream I have to let go/who asked you I just want silence/not a penny from your mindless thoughts/that I go over a thousand times/people passing without smiles/in a place where I think their god resides/oh God Ive lost all control long ago but i had it coming/it just laid low/no signs of warning/but a suckerpunch/break my legs, I fall to my knees/maybe its where Im supposed to be