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Rollin' into work everyday like a deadbeat
Workin' on data in Excel spreadsheets
Been about 5 years workin' as a temp
10 different bosses – for all of'em I simp
A cup of liquid caffeine – blueberry pop tarts
Wishin' for a machine drippin' shots of morphine
Countin' down every tick tock of the clock
Flooded by emails longer than a city block
Each one urgent – stressin' like a surgeon
Hopin' for some kind of deliverance sermon
Nodin' off on the regular is a habit
Foamin' at the mouth like a mad dog rabid
Thoughts like these happen on the man's dime
I'm in my prime – heartbeat's a flatline
One day I'll be bustin' rhymes with Ad Rock.
Sheet! Until then it's just me and my labtop.
Ah, Man! That's how it is?
Ah, Man! I can't believe this here
Ah, Man! What the F I'mma do?
End up a yuppee and F me too?
Ah, Man! That's how it is?
Ah, Man! I can't believe this here
Ah, Man! What the F I'mma do?
End up a yuppee and F me too?
I'm present... ly day... dreamin'
Dreamin' for the day I'm in Squaw Valley skiin'
Tearin' up the slopes – scopin' ski bunnies
Wonder how it feels to have enough free money
Take a vacation – somewhere like Aruba
Take a surf class and do a little scuba
But there's no hope for a bloke like me
I get my jollies from reality tv
I love New York or that Flavor Flav one
On the Bachelorette I'd be the first one done
Or do the White Rapper and play like I'm dapper
But even MC Serch can't control his own laughter
So I maintain and pretend I'm the bomb
And search for a friend on
Or search for a mate on strictly platonic
I wonder why this isn't workin' out dog gone it
Ah, Man! That's how it is?
Ah, Man! I can't believe this here
Ah, Man! What the F I'mma do?
End up a joke and get played like a fool?
Ah, Man! That's how it is?
Ah, Man! I can't believe this here
Ah, Man! What the F I'mma do?
End up a joke and get played like a fool?
I'm lookin' for beauty so I must be the beast
Or is it the geek, and stu-stutter when I speak
So I hop a plane and hit the Vegas strip
I must get a girl now cuz I'm so hip
The only thing I get with a strip and a hip
Is the strip club I'm at every night of my trip
Dolin' out the cash for too many lap dances
One more twenty for the next girls advances
I can get so much if I just flash the bucks
End up spendin' hundreds and I didn't get a touch
Back to my hotel and everytime I gamble
Ladies next to me fall asleep as I ramble
I know! My calling is to be a jetsetter
Right... I'll just end up with a socialite
That or a cougar, and I'm 30 years younger
Call me "Sophisticated Big Boy Blunder"
Ah, Man! That's how it is?
Ah, Man! I can't believe this here
Ah, Man! What the F I'mma do?
End up a joke and get played like a fool?
Ah, Man! That's how it is?
Ah, Man! I can't believe this here
Ah, Man! What the F I'mma do?
Now I'm so happy with my girl – 62