Unmade

Give me a sec to collect my thoughts
I write them down and I dust them off
Just some book on a shelf with a missing page
And the front torn off
I guess the words I made got in the way
And never got across
I know we don't got much to say
But I miss the days when we used to talk
Waiting for change, but each day goes by
I remind myself that our time got lost
Do you ever think of me? or not at all...
Hope hurts most when the truth's involved
So just know, I hope you don't
'Cause I do my best up against the wall

I don't want to float through life, I wanna drown in it
Break myself down, turn around in it
Take it until I've had enough and then build it back up
From the top to the ground again
So go ahead and say what you need to say
'Cause those words might have hurt me yesterday
And dig deep in the cuts of my chest
Just to find out that you'll never get the best of me

So dear tragedy, have a seat
I don't give a fuck what you do to me
'Cause yeah this light's going to burn out
But I can't fall, never learned how
And a light can hide when it's dark now
I told a lie when the truth would've worked out

There's nothing left for me to say
And all my friends gave me away
When every word has been unmade
You hide your eyes and fall away
If there's something left for you to say
Some twisted words, a shattered phrase
Rolls off the tongue, it falls and fades
Lied to your face, I'll never change

Am I sick of home, or just homesick?
Exhausting how I can't focus
Adjust and go, flux and flow
Smile so you don't notice
'Cause right now, now's not a good time
You don't want to know me on the inside
Shadows move fast in a blackout
Lost in a dark place, gone, but I'm back now
At the start, wasn't no one there for me
To care for me, I tiptoed carefully
And yeah, you were looking to embarrass me
But you move in the dark so carelessly
And the worst thing? I miss you bad...
I hate myself for the times we had
Tell me now what it's like to know
Once you let go you can never get it back

They say when no one believes you, believe yourself
Stare in the mirror until you see yourself
Crawl until you walk until you free yourself
And when they start lending hands you won't need the help
But I'm lost in the glare of the limelight
Scared at the thought of my old life
Phone in my hand and it's midnight
All missed calls, guess I never got the time right