I Love Nascar

We got owners, favorite drivers,
Boy, that Tony Stewart's a whiner.
And we got rookies, advertisers,
Like uhhh let's say: Havoline, Target, Sharpie, Caterpillar, Nextel,
Mountain Dew, Dupont, Lowe's, Home Depot, Kodak, M&Ms, UPS, Tide, Alltel, Gillette, Kelloggs, v*agra, Dewalt, and uhhh Budweiser.
But the trophy girls still have my favorite parts.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

We got cautions, we got pitstops,
You can't hear a dang thing once the flag drops.
And poor Kyle Petty, an' Swervin' Marlin, ha ha,
Are gonna find it tough to beat Mark Martin.
'Cause that v*agra car is always driven hard.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

I love NASCAR, it's my kind of race.
Just watchin' jeff gordon plow up a wall,
Puts a smile on dale jr.'s face.
No caviar, it's beer and Mopar.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

I like short tracks, you'll see more wrecks,
And about a million screamin' rednecks.
And ol' Jeff Burton, ha, an' poor Mike Skinner,
Well, they've done forgot what it's like to be a winner.
And Ken Schrader still ain't sure who his sponsors are.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

"Hey, that was a close one up there fellas I about got into one there.
I might pull over right up here next pitstop, I want you to get two right front tires.
I need a wedge on the left side, get this windsheild cleaned, get on the gas.
And if you don't care, hand me a pair of underwear, I have messed all in my drawers."

I like football. (I like football.)
I like my wrestlin'.
I like a good game of air hockey,
I like some ping-pong now an' then.
How about you, Toby?

(Toby)
I love NASCAR, it's my kind of race.
Just to see Big E back on the track,
Would put a smile on every face.
No one drove a car quite like Earnhardt.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love NASCAR.

(Both)
Vroom, vroom, vroom

(Toby)
Gentlemen, start your engines

(Both)
I love NASCAR.