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Performed by Adam Sandler
When I was a boy
There was no limit to what I could eat
Shake after shake after shake after shake
Followed by all kinds of red meat
Metabolism runnin' around so fast
My body never gained to weight
That p*ssed off all my Momma's friends
And made my big-boned sister irate
But now I'm a man
And all that frolicking has caused my ego to hurt
'Cause even when I'm in the shower alone
I'm to embarrased to remove my shirt
What made a millionaire out of Mr. Frito-Lay
Made a fat mother fker outta me
What made a millionaire out of Mr. Frito-Lay
Made a fat mother fker outta me
And all them cookies I been munching lately
My feets are becoming difficult to see
I believe it was my Daddy
Who led me to this eating disease
By calling me "The Little Candy Ass"
When I couldn't finish a burger with cheese
Or maybe it was my Momma
Who got me addicted to all the wrong foods
Only when I gobbled down every chicken cutlet
Would I get to see Momma's good moods
They said eat this, they said eat that
To stay skinny there was no chance
And now when I walk I hear corduroy
Even though I ain't wearing pants
What made a millionaire out of Mr. Frito-Lay
You fat fk, You fat fk
Made a fat mother fker outta me
What made a millionaire out of Mr. Frito-Lay
You fat fk, You fat fk
Made a fat mother fker outta me
And all that ice cream I been eating lately
My chins alone weight 203
The diet starts tomorrow!
I have a grapefruit for breakfast
For lunch a bown of white rice
Dinnertime it's a saltless potato
I ain't allowed no spice
If this diet's gonna work
Tonight I can't eat no more
"Just go to sleep," I say to myself
As I close the bedroom door
Two in the morning, I wake up to pi*s
My belly's hungry and achin'
Tiptoe to the kitchen, fk the diet
Bring on the chips flavored with bacon
What made a millionaire out of Mr. Frito-Lay
Made a fat mother fker outta me
What made a millionaire out of Mr. Frito-Lay
Made a fat mother fker outta me
And all them crumb-cakes I been eating lately